


Empty souls

by Justina__Love



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - The 100 (TV) Fusion, Betrayal, Blood and Gore, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Grounders (The 100) - Freeform, Love Triangles, M/M, Minor Character Death, Original Character(s), Plot Twists, Smut, The 100 (TV) Season 1, The 100 (TV) Season 2, The 100 (TV) Season 3, The 100 (TV) Season 4, The 100 (TV) Season 5, The Ark Station
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:47:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 17,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26182915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justina__Love/pseuds/Justina__Love
Summary: After being sent to the ground along with another ninety-nine delinquents, Lavender struggles to survive on earth as it turns out to be more dangerous than any of them anticipated. While caught in a love triangle between John Murphy and Bellamy Blake Lav must decide if she will follow her head or heart.*Ongoing rewrite*
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Echo, Bellamy Blake/Original Female Character(s), Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Emori/John Murphy (The 100), Finn Collins/Clarke Griffin, Finn Collins/Raven Reyes, John Murphy (The 100) & Original Character(s), John Murphy (The 100)/Original Female Character(s), Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Kudos: 54





	1. 00

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After watching the show again, I decided to rewrite this story. If you read the original version, you will notice some difference, but the main plot will be the same.

**Empty souls**

The first part of this story will be based off TV show/books, then I will write my own version of events. I don’t usually write intros however due to the fact the story will have darker moments I felt it was necessary.

**Warnings/Triggers**

•violence 

•attempted rape

•heartbreak 

•torture 

•mentions of past abortions 

•main character death

•blood and gore 

•anxiety 

•depression 

•panic attacks 

As I mentioned before this story will have darker moments that I listed before, please read carefully any case anything is triggering.


	2. 1.01

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all, this is my first attempt at writing a 100 fic. It will stray from the original story, but I’ll try to stick to it best I can. Hope you enjoy.

“Not long now” Jill grumbled to herself.

Huffing, she slumped against the wall opposite her tally marks. They sealed her up in the Skybox just after her sixteen birthday, and today she turned eighteen and would be floated for her ‘crimes’.

“Any minute now.” She mumbled to herself.

Talking to herself had become her new normal to make up for her lack of communication with others. Sitting with her legs crossed, hand shaking while poised over the side of her boot, Jill always had a knife hidden in it. Depending on what guard walked through the doors, she might need to use it. All she wanted was to tell the truth, but the ark's council would never let that happen.

As she heard the heavy footsteps getting closer, Jill prepared herself mentally. This was it.

“Prisoner eighty-nine turn and look at the wall with your hands behind your back.” A guard’s voice called in before they even opened the door.

Doing as she was told, Jill called back. “I’ve done it.”

It surprised Jill when the guard entered the cell alongside a young woman in a medical uniform. After the women inspected her vitals, the guard clamped a thick metal bracelet around her left wrist.

“What the hell is going on? You need to tell me? Jill demanded.

“You are going to the ground.” The guard informed her.

_**The ground?** Was this some kind of sick joke? Nobody had lived on earth on for a long time. It was physically impossible._

From then on everything happened so fast. Before Jill knew what was happening, she was among the one hundred being sent to the ground.  
Jill tried to look at the bright side. At least she got to live a little longer. What she would be alive to see would remain a mystery.

On her way to meet the other ‘prisoners’ she walked past doctor Abby Griffin, and it took everything in her power not to try and rip her head off. The older women was supposed to protect them...she should have fought for them. Instead, she did nothing. Doctor or not, Jill would always think of the women as a coward. When Abby looked at her walking past, they shared a knowing look without saying a word.

# _______

When they landed on the ground a few things became clear, firstly the ‘no rules’ life would never work. Second, it was going to be a dick measuring competition to see who got to run the place. The third thing that Jill knew for sure was Bellamy Blake was hiding something. Behind his macho persona, he was scared.

Board of listing to a girl called Clarke talking so much about how they needed to go find some mountain, Jill wondered off away from the crowds. She struggled to believe that all the surrounding greens were real. Even though she had read it in books, Jill had no idea how large the trees would be, or how bright the different colors would look. It felt surreal. Closing her eyes, she let her mind wonder to what it would be like to feel grass underneath her bare feet for the first, or...

“Jill?”

Jill turned to see John Murphy running towards her. He picked her up and hugged her tightly spinning her round. He had gotten so much taller than the last time she met him.

“What the hell are you doing here? I never even saw you on the way down.” Murphy said, still holding her.

“I got arrested not long after...you know. What about you? Why are you here, John?” Jill asked raising her eyebrows at him.

She was so happy to see him that Jill never noticed the way Murphy changed when he saw Bellamy glancing over at them. He had let go of her and his excitement seemed to had died down.

Murphy never responded, he just pulled the woolly hat that covering her head down somewhat and chuckled. “I’m glad you’re still alive.”

Jill watched him walking away, smiling. Apart from getting taller and filling out a bit more, he still looked the same as she remembered. She was glad he was on the ground. John was a good guy, Jill just hoped he didn’t get too carried away being Bellamy’s ‘right-hand man’.

Turning to her left Jill saw someone else she recognized. “Steph?”

The redheaded girl looked up at her with tears in her eyes. “Lavy? Is that you?” She asked quietly.

The young girl's breath was hitched and broken from crying so much. Jill kneeled down beside her. “Hey, are you okay?”

Steph couldn’t have been older than fifteen now and seemed distressed.

“She’s been like this since we landed. See if you can get her to shut up!” One of the older boys called Harrison hissed.

Jill stuck the finger up at him before helping the girl to her feet. “Why don’t we go a walk? Get you some space away from all the noise.”

Steph nodded. Jill knew Steph just needed some time to adjust to what had happened. They had only been on the earth for roughly an hour, anyway. Coming to earth from lockup was a lot scarier for some of them and being around asshole boys like Bellamy and Harrison wouldn’t help her feel any better.

“When did you get locked up?” Jill asked curiously.

“Shortly after you.”

_Damn it, another life ruined for no reason._

# ______

As they walked through the forest, Bellamy was frowning. His sister had run off with Clarke and her band of merry men, instead of staying like he wished. All he wanted was to keep her safe, but as usual his stupidly naïve sister didn’t listen to him. He would need to find a babysitter for her at this rate.

Bellamy also couldn’t help but notice the foolish smirk that was on Murphy’s face, he didn’t know why but it was annoying him. He had seen the way Murphy had looked at the girl with the stupid wooly hat earlier. Jill seemed like trouble and a distraction. He wondered how far Murphy’s loyalty for her went.

“Who were you talking to before?” Bellamy asked with a flat tone in his voice.

“Just someone I know from the ark.” Murphy frowned. He didn’t want to talk about her.

“What was her name? Jill?”

Murphy responded. “Jill Slate.”

_**Slate?** _

“Slate? As in councillor Laura and Thomas Slate’s daughter?” Bellamy asked wide-eyed.

Murphy nodded. Bellamy had heard the stories about what happened at the ark's orphanage. The infamous Jill Slate looked nothing like he imagined she would. He had pictured someone a lot bigger and feral looking.

“Right” Bellamy deadpanned, “just remember no distractions. You can’t take your eyes off the prize for anything, you can screw her after we get everyone’s bracelets off.”

Murphy wasn’t sure why, but his hands balled into fists. Jill wasn’t some whore who he would ‘screw’. If anybody but Bellamy had said that about her, he would have put them on the ground without a second thought. Murphy didn’t want to go against him for any reason so soon...however he had his limits, and Jill was one of them.

“Is it true?” Bellamy asked without looking back at him.

“No.”

Bellamy smirked, knowing he was getting Murphy riled up. “You know, Wells and Clarke don’t trust her. They think she’s a danger to the rest of us.”

“Wells and Clarke better mind their own fucking business.” Murphy snapped.

Bellamy’s smirked faded as they walked back towards the camp. He could see kids gathering and yelling.

“Bellamy!” A kid called Monty yelled while running towards him.

“What’s going on?” He demanded.

“Octavia got bitten by something in the water and they have speared jasper,” Monty said before leading him towards Octavia.

 _No. No. No, this couldn’t be happening._ Bellamy wasn’t ready to lose his sister. She was everything to him.


	3. 1.02

Jill rolled her eyes as Bellamy, Clarke, and Finn argued about what they should do about the boy who had been speared. Time wasters.

“We need to go now, the longer he’s out there, the less chance we have at saving him.” Clarke pointed out.

Jill watched as Bellamy glanced between the drop-ship his sister was in and the blonde. It was clear he agreed with Clarke but didn’t want to leave Octavia on her own.

“I’ll stay here with Octavia,” Jill said.

“Fine.” Bellamy grumbled, “nobody else leaves this camp. Understand?”

Wells frowned, “Jill can’t control what others do.”

Jill glanced at Wells and shook her head. All his comment was going to do was lead to another argument, even if he meant well.

“I will make sure Octavia does nothing to hurt her leg, but that’s it.” Jill said, staring directly at Bellamy.

The moment became tense as four eyed gazed upon Bellamy waiting for him to argue with Jill. He didn’t.

“Let’s go.”

As they followed Bellamy, Murphy squeezed Jills hand softly on his way past, while Clarke looked her up and down. The blonde still wasn’t convinced that trusting Jill was a good idea.

# ______

“You in the hat!” Jill frowned as she turned to face Harrison. _What did the prick want now?_ “Where is she?!” He spat while continuing to walk closer to her.

Jill narrowed her eyes, “where’s who?”

Harrison was now standing inches away from her, “you know who I mean. That little bitch Steph, I tried to take her bracelet, and she kicked me in the balls!”

Shaking her head, Jill smirked. “Good. Maybe you will learn to keep your goddamn hands to yourself in future.”

A couple of other boys chuckled, causing Harrison’s face to turn red. He was embarrassed and that wasn’t something he would let go easily. He yanked Jill's arm causing her to freeze on the spot.

“Harrison that’s enough!”

Both Harrison and Jill turned to see Octavia towards them. The younger Blake looked pissed.

“Stay out of this freak,” Harrison hissed.

Octavia stepped forward, not caring that a small crowd was now forming around them. “Let go of her,” she snapped, before pulling Harrison’s arm off her. “Are you okay?” Octavia asked softly.

Jill went to reply when Harrison spat on the ground and cut her off.

“Whatever, the slut will get what’s coming to her soon enough.” Jill stared at him, wide-eyed. She didn’t know what to say. “How long till Steph follows in your slutty footsteps before going on a killing spree.”

Something snapped inside Jill when she heard that. She leaned forward and punched Harrison in the face before kneeing him in the stomach, “if you ever touch Steph again I will rip your balls clean off.”

“I wonder what Bellamy will think of this? A murderer and the crazy bitch from under the floor trying to run this place while he’s gone?” Harrison grinned.

Jill stepped closer to him, “I dare you to go over to Bellamy when he gets back and repeat what you just said about his _**sister**_ to his face.”

“Pack it in, Harrison!” Atom scowled. His expressing softened when he turned his attention to Octavia and Jill, “Are you girls okay?”

“Yeah...I think we are,” Octavia answered smiling at Jill.

 _Oh that smile._ Octavia liked Atom, how nice. Jill smiled back before going to look for Steph.

# ***

Later on that day the small gang of ‘hero’s’ returned to camp with a dying Jasper, with Bellamy and Murphy closely behind them some kind of enormous cat.

The nighttime was intense. Bellamy gave a speech on how they could do ‘whatever the hell they want’ on the ground, and Murphy was right beside him. Jill was disappointed in him, she didn’t think John would buy into it.

She watched as they made people take off their bracelets for food. Bellamy even punched a guy for trying to get some food without taking his off.

“Hey, you look lonely over here,” Murphy smirked.

“I’m fine.”

When Jill looked up at him, Murphy reached his hand out to give her a stick of food, which she rejected.

“Mines not off yet,” she replied holding her left wrist up, “am I going to get hit next if I take it.”

Murphy frowned at her. “I’d never let anybody touch you!”

“Not even Bellamy?”

John knelt down in front of Jill, running one of his fingers along the edge of her hat.

“He’d be a dead man if he touched you, like I said, I’d never let anybody hurt you. Now eat.” Jill went to protest again, when Murphy shoved the stick in her hand. “Atom told me Harrison gave you a hard time earlier?”

“What are you, my great protector now?” Jill asked teasingly in between bites of meat.

“Yes.”

“John it’s fine...”

“I need to go” Murphy said, looking over his shoulder.

Jill followed his gaze to see Bellamy glaring at them. What was his problem? “Bellamy sent you over here to get my wrist band off, didn’t he?”

The comment took Murphy aback. She was wrong, Bellamy would probably flip for giving her food. “No, he didn’t. Any more problems from Harrison or anyone else you come straight to me, okay?”

“Yeah, fine. Thanks for the grub.”

# ______

_“Isn’t that the girl who slaughtered a guard and her friend?”_

_“Jill is more dangerous than a grounder! I don’t want to share a camp with a crazy bitch like her!”_

_“They should have floated her along with her parents.”_

_“I heard she had a baby on the ark with a guard.”_

_“She’s bat shit crazy!”_

_“Her parents took bribes so they could experiment new drugs on her.”_

_“I bet she keeps the knife underneath her hat.”_

Jill tried to pretend she didn’t care what others said about her, but it was hard to hide her embarrassment during the daytime. She was the girl who went crazy and killed her best friend for no reason. Jill shuffled uncontrollably, she could feel a gaze burning into her. She looked up to notice Bellamy watching her.

Hearing a muffled ‘fucking bitch’ she turned to look at Harrison along with another camp member walking behind her. Shit. She hadn’t seen him since the incident the day before, and he looked like hell. Jill had punched him in the face, but not hard enough to bruise him. Harrison now had a burst lip, a bruised jawline, and two black eyes.

Bellamy watched as the girl who appeared to be bothered by nothing blinked away tears. He saw how Jills chest and neck turned red. Bellamy didn’t know her story, but he knew better than to believe gossip spread on the ark. Bellamy rarely gave a shit, but after hearing how she stuck up for Octavia he decided she might be good to have around for his sisters sake. He was strangely drawn to Jill for many reasons.

“Bell” he spun to face Octavia coming towards him.

“Any news on Jasper?” He asked.

His sister just shook his head, “no not yet but..”

“Murphy, stop!”

Both siblings turned to see Clarke and Finn trying to pull Murphy off someone. Bellamy stormed over and demanded to know what was going on.

“If you say one more thing about her and I will fucking kill you.” Murphy screamed in a boy called Jack face.

“It was just a joke, I meant nothing by it!” the boy pleaded before he ran away.

Murphy ignored everyone as they spoke to him. He walked towards Jill, who was staring at him wide-eyed and dragged her by the arm towards his tent.

“Does someone want to tell us what that was about? We already have Jasper to worry about, the last thing anyone needs is Murphy causing drama,” Octavia snapped.

“She’s right, Bellamy, you need to get Murphy under control before he causes a riot.” Clarke preached.

“Sure thing princess,” Bellamy said mockingly, “anything else? No good. Now what caused it?”

“Jake said Jill should have been floated along with her parents.” Wells informed them, frowning.

“And Murphy beat him up over that? You know what don’t answer that. I’m going to check on Jasper, Bell keep your men in line!” Clarke said before storming off.

“I think Jake had it coming,” Octavia shrugged.

Bellamy watched as Murphy pulled Jill into his tent. He wondered what exactly was going on between them. In his eyes, Murphy wasn’t interested in Jill until something happened to her. She was just an excuse for him to start a fight.

# ______

When Murphy reached his tent, he finally let go of Jill’s arm. Murphy was so angry at what Jack had said he never even realized how tightly he had been holding onto her. Not until he saw his friend rubbing the part he had just let go of.

“Shit, I’m sorry. Are you okay?” He asked closing his eyes.

Murphy was taken aback when he felt a set of lips pressed against his right cheek. He opened his eyes to see Jill smiling up at him.

“Thank you, nobody has ever stuck up for me like that before.” Jill smiled sadly at him before stepping back.

“Ignore them, they don’t know shit about you. I will fuck up anyone who says anything about you again, hell I’d kill anyone who dares to mess with you.” For once Murphy was being truthful. On the ark he had nobody for a very long time, the only person he truly trusted was Jill, and now he had her back he wouldn’t let anyone threaten that.

He pressed his forehead against hers, “nobody is going to come in here, my tent is off limits. You can take it off.”

Jill leaned back from him and nodded, she pulled the hat off her head and letting her long purple hair fall down past her shoulders. Regardless of her hair being covered in sweat from wearing her hat all day, Murphy still ran his fingers through the ends of it. He studied her for a moment.

“What’s going on?”

Murphy stepped back confused, “what do you mean?”

Jill sighed, “You are being a total dick towards others down here, why? I saw what you did to Wells. Did you really need his wrist band that badly?”

Murphy stared to laugh, a deep belly laugh that confused Jill. She didn’t think it was funny.

“Sorry, did I say something amusing?”

Murphy shook his head. “No...you just say what you think, I’d missed that.”

“What about the Wells thing?” Jill asked, now frowning.

“He’s annoying, and I hate him.” Murphy pouted before sighing, there was no point lying to the girl in-front of him. “What was I supposed to do? Say no? Bellamy would have turned on me.”

Jill didn’t know what to say. John was trying to keep in with Bellamy. She couldn’t judge him for that, right? He just wanted to survive.

Murphy moves to look out the flaps of his tent. “I need you to do something for me.”

“What do you desire me to do?” Jill asked, shoving her hair back beneath her hat.

Murphy traced his fingers along her wrist “Let me take your bracelet off.”

“What? Why?” She asked, snapping her wrist back. “I don’t want to, and I don’t agree with you or Mbege forcing others to remove them.”

“That’s why I’m asking!” He snapped back. “If I take this stupid thing off now, then Mbege and Bellamy won’t have a reason to be near you.”

“I thought you said I shouldn’t listen to them?” She eyed him suspiciously.

He stepped closer to her and spoke in a low voice. “I can’t be around all the time to protect you.”

“And what makes you think I need protecting? I’ve looked after myself for years. All on my own.” The last part stung when she saw the look in his eyes.

“Jilllisten to me. Most of the people down here are real criminals, people who deserved to be locked up. I don’t trust them, and don’t want them to hurt you to get that metal thing off your wrist...”

“Do you think they would hurt me to get it?” Jill asked quietly.

Murphy sighed, “I honestly don’t know. Things are changing down here fast, and we need to do whatever it takes to survive.” He linked his fingers with Jills. “Bellamy is running this place and is planning making everyone remove them tonight...it’s better to make your enemies close friends.”

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”

“Whatever. Just think about it, please?” Murphy groaned.

Jill shoved his chest playfully. “John Murphy begging me? I never thought I’d see the day.”

Murphy grunted in response to her comment. Jill didn’t seem to release how far Bellamy will go to get control of the camp.

Jill leaning closer to him. “What’s in it for me if I take it off?”

Murphy smirked at her, “you’ll only find out if you do it.”

Jill shoved him playfully again before going to leave his tent, when she felt Murphy grab her hand.

“I think you should sleep in her with me from now on. I mean at lest I’ll know your safe during the night. You can have the bed and I’ll sleep on the ground.” he said, staring into her gray eyes.

“I can’t, I’m letting Steph stay with me, so I can keep her safe.” Jill smiled. Murphy could be a manipulative asshole but deep down he was good.

Murphy let out a deep sigh. That wasn’t the answer he wanted. “The minute anyone tries anything I want you to come find me, okay?”

“Sure thing, babe. Now we better go before you’re boss comes looking for you.”

Murphy shook his head, smirking before following Jill towards the food tent.

# ______

Another night of Bellamy, Mbege and Murphy acting like total jackasses was beyond irritating. Murphy wasn’t lying when he said they would force everyone to take off their bracelets. Most people had agreed so far, especially after Mbege punched the one guy who said no.

Jill noticed Wells, Clarke, and Finn all frowning at them burning the bracelets. She had a choice to make, let Murphy take hers off, or refuse with the risk of getting sucked into Wells argument. She decided to let Murphy take it off.

Jill had been sitting with Steph when they first arrived, but Steph had a panic attack and returned to their tent. Jill felt sorry for her and wished she could make the young girl feel better.

Jill jumped when Bellamy suddenly appeared in front of her. He crouched down to her level. Jill looked away, while lifting her wrist up. She was waiting for the pain to start, but It surprised her that all she could feel was the cold smooth side of the blade before a pinching feeling.

“Ouch, you don’t need to be so rough.”

“Sorry.”

Bellamy was still holding onto her wrist, gently rubbing the part of her wrist he had scratched. Neither of them noticed the way Murphy was glaring over at them.

_”Bellamy!”_

Octavia called her brother when she saw the look on Murphy’s face. She wasn’t an idiot and knew exactly what her brother was doing. He was trying to get a rise out of him.

The moment Bellamy left, Jill felt like she could breathe again, that was until Clarke sat down next to her. Couldn’t she have a minute to herself?

The blonde pointed towards her wrist. “I’m surprised you let Bellamy take it off.”

Jill shrugged. “Why not? The ark has done nothing for me, and nobody will care if it says I’m dead.”

“What about everybody else? If the others think we are dead, they won’t follow us down. We need to let them know it’s safe.” Clarke said, frowning.

“I just told you I don’t have anyone else on the ark. Why are you even sitting next to me? Aren’t you afraid I might snap and kill you?” Jill watched, amused as Clarke’s face turned red. “Yeah, I heard what you said about me, and it’s not true.”

“I thought...”

“Let’s not be fake, okay? You don’t like me, so don’t pretend to care what I do and don’t try to guilt me into something.”

Jill stormed off towards the gate. She wasn’t sure why, but Clarke’s comments had gotten to her. Jill made sure nobody was watching as she left camp. It was actually quite beautiful in the forest, grounders and radioactive land aside it would have been a nice place to live.

“Jill! What the hell are you doing?”

She spun to see Murphy storming towards her. He looked extremely pissed off.

“I had to get out of there, I couldn’t stand it any longer.” Jill admitted.

Murphy stepped closer to her. “You had me worried, I thought something had happened to you.” He snapped. His harsh expression softened when he saw how sad Jill looked. “I get it, it’s hard trying to fit in when all anybody see’s is the worst in you. How’s the wrist?”

It’s fine. If you want to go back, that’s fine, I just need some time away from it all.” Jill said, looking at the ground.

Murphy reaches out a hand for Jill to take. “Come on, I got something i need to show you.”

# ______

Murphy led her to a large pool of water, Jill stopped walking as she watched him get closer to it. The thought of entering dark water was making her nervous.

“It’s a natural spring, nothing is going to hurt you I promise.” Murphy said without looking back at her as he began removing his clothes.

“What are you doing?” Jill asked.

“Going for a swim, the water is still warm. I found the place the other night and thought you’d like it.” Murphy shrugged before jumping into the water.

Jill couldn’t help but smile at him as he showed her his trademark cheeky grin. “Turn around then.”

Murphy done as she said but shouted back to her “it’s dark I wouldn’t see anything anyway..hey what are you doing?”

Jill had stripped down to her underwear and was washing the rest of their clothes.

“I’m glad you are down here...I was worried about you, Lavy. Things on the ark weren’t the same without you,” he said softly.

Jill turned to face him. “We used to have so much fun before all that happened.”

“We did. I always wondered how much trouble we would have gotten into if they kept us together.” Murphy grinned.

“I think you are making up for all the trouble we missed out on the ark down here, don’t you?” Jill said giving him a knowing smilewhich Murphy smirked at.

He and Jill beamed at each other in a comfortable silence, both just happy to be with each other. So many words unsaid. Jill broke the silence by splashing water into his face before giggling and swimming away.

Murphy just looked at her with an amused look on his face, this was the girl he remembered. Always having fun and laughing, not having a care in the world. No matter how bleak it got.

“Scared you can’t keep up?” she teased him.

Murphy began swimming after her until he eventually caught her. He grabbed her ankle and playfully pulled Jill towards him, grinning. Neither one of them was interlay sure what happened next, but before they knew it they pressed together their lips. Years of flirting, friendship and tension, all coming together at once.

Murphy began kissing Jills neck, leaving a trail of marks down her until he reached her bra. Murphy wasn’t a virgin, but he felt this was virgin territory.

Jill crashed her lips against his again, while running her fingers through his hair as he squeezed her ass.

Murphy suddenly pulled away.

“John, what’s wrong?” Jill asked, worried.

“I think we should go.” Murphy said bluntly.

Jill said nothing but done as he suggested and got out the water. “What just happened?”

“I thought I heard...”

Jill let out a loud scream. Everything turned red, before it turned dark. She glanced down to see her skin turning a a deep shade of red.


	4. 1.03

“Clarke! I need Clarke!” Murphy yelled loud as he could, waiting for the gates to open.

Murphy ran fast as could through the forest back to the base, while carrying Jill who was bleeding in his arms. He had grown more worried as she had stopped talking five minutes earlier. At least when Jill was cursing he knew she was awake.

“What the hell happened?” Clarke asked as Finn helped Murphy lay Jill onto a metal table once inside the drop-ship.

“Oh, we went dancing downtown.” He said, pointing towards the arrow sticking out of his friend's shoulder. “Grounders.” Murphy corrected, seeing the glare the blonde was giving him.

“She’s gone pale and lost a lot of blood.” Clarke places the back of her palm against Jill’s forehead. “We need to get her temperature down and to do a transfusion...but we don’t have any blood bags down here” Clarke informed them.

“Take my blood.” Murphy said, rolling up his sleeve. He needed Jill to survive, he couldn’t do this without. “Well, don’t just stand there, do something!”

Clarke nodded. “Finn, go get me a needle. Murphy, you should cover her up, but keep her shoulder free. I’ll see if I can get any cold water.” Before she left, Clarke tide ripped up rags around her bleeding shoulder.

Murphy watched as both Finn and Clarke left the room. His lips went into a fine line as he brushed strands of hair out of her face. It would pissed Jill off that her hair was on show. Murphy covered up her nearly naked torso with his jacket and finished pulling her jeans up. When Jill was shot, she only had her bra on, with her jeans only halfway up her legs.

“Wow. I guess the rumors are true then.” Finn said as he entered the room again.

Clarke followed behind with a bucket of water. She glanced at Jill, whose light purple hair was tainted red with blood. “I didn’t think it was possible to have hair that color” Clarke said stepping closer to Jill to get a better look.

Murphy frowned. “Nobody mentions it.”

Clarke gulped down. “Finn, press this against her wound. I can’t promise this will work, but I will try everything I can.” Clarke said, before she tied a piece of string around Murphy’s arm.

“Please Clarke, just do anything you can.” Murphy practically begged.

Please don’t die.

# ______

A horrible stinging feeling in Jills shoulder woke her. She felt as if her body was burning from the inside out. What happened? She had a vague memory of hearing Bellamy Blake yelling at Clarke, before telling her he would ‘fix this’.

“John?” She groaned. The Last thing she remembered was getting dressed by the small lake.

Murphy sprung to her side. “How are you feeling?”

Jill couldn’t help but noticed how awful he looked. Murphy was covered in dried blood, his arms were bruised. He looked exhausted.

“I’m okay.” Jill said shrugging her shoulders, which she instantly regretted. “What happened?”

“A grounder shot you in the shoulder and caused you to lose a lot of blood... I thought I was going to lose you, Lavy. You had me worried, I thought I was going to lose you for good.” Murphy whispered.

“I’m struggling to remember.”

Murphy felt a pang of pain in his chest. This was all his fault, if he hadn’t taken her to lake none of this would have been happening.

Jill glanced up at his sad face before reaching out and stroking his cheek. Murphy leaned down to kiss her forehead. But Jill captures his lips with her own.

“I’m glad you are feeling better.” Bellamy grunted. “Murphy, we need to go before it gets dark.” He said in a flat tone.

“What? Why are you going?” Jill asked, panicked.

Murphy linked his fingers with hers and sighed. He was thankful Clarke had our Jills hat back on before she left. “We need to go on another hunting trip, we are running low on food.”

Jill frowned, “you better be careful John.”

Murphy kissed her on the forehead and nose. “I’ll be discreet, okay? Just stay alive here for me.”

“Come on _**John**_ , we haven’t got all day.” Bellamy said, glancing at Murphy.

Jill was only on her own for a short while before Clarke came to check up on her. Jill wasn’t certain what was more painful, her wound getting cleaned or watching Wells mop over the blonde while she drooled over Finn.

# _______

Bellamy glanced around to make sure nobody was in earshot of him and Murphy. “So what’s the deal with Jills purple hair?”

Murphy grunted as a response. _Fucking Clarke and Finn couldn’t keep their mouths shut._

“I’ll just ask her instead,” Bellamy shrugged.

“Don’t.”

Bellamy stopped walking and glared at him. “You either tell me or I’ll ask the butcher queen myself.”

Murphy snapped. “Fine. Her mom took experimental drugs while she was pregnant and it caused Jill's hair to turn purple, but after she was born the ark kept running tests on her.”

“Why do you care so much?” Bellamy asked. He was curious why a selfish person like Murphy would risk his life for Jill.

“We were good friends.” Murphy shrugged nonchalantly.

“That didn’t answer my question.”

“We needed each other, okay? Neither of us had anybody for a long time on the ark. It was just us.”

Bellamy began walking at a slower pace again. He couldn’t imagine caring about somebody so much who wasn’t family.

# ______

“Steph, wait!”

Jill shouted as she ran after the younger girl. She still felt dizzy from laying down for so long, but nobody else was going after the redhead.

“You need to stop, Stephanie! You're going to get yourself killed!”

Finally, the younger girl stopped running, Jill caught her breath before moving to yell again. Except she couldn’t. A large hand covered her mouth and pulled her backwards at the same time a spear went through Steph’s body. Jill tried to scream as she watched the bloodied body fall to the ground.

“Don’t say a word.” Bellamy whispered into her ear as he dragged her away. He had noticed her running in the opposite direction as he reached the camp's gate.

Jill fought against him at first. She wanted to save Steph. Why not? They had pulled Jasper back from death's door.

“What the fuck is going on?” Murphy asked as he stepped towards them, with Miller behind him.

Bellamy let go of Jill, who glared at him before storming into camp. The three of them looked at each other before following her.

“Harrison! You son of a bitch!” Jill hissed.

Harrison smirked at her as she shoved him with her one good arm, which amused him further. “You can’t get enough of me, can you, darling?”

“Fuck You!” Jill hissed before slapping him across the face. “Steph his dead because of you!”

“Wha...what?” He asked as his smile faltered.

“Because if you and your stupid prank she ran into the woods sacred and the grounders got her.”

Harrison put his hand on Jill’s bad shoulder, provoking her to let out a large whine. “It’s not my fault she was stupid enough to run into the forest! It’s just a shame they didn’t spear you! You guard fucking..”

Jill cut him off by kneeing him in the stomach, making him crumble to the ground.

“Don’t even think about.” Murphy said in a warning tone as Harrison got back on his feet. “Jillcome on, you need to get your shoulder looked at.”

Bellamy was impressed. Jill could take down Harrison with only one arm. He glanced around wondering if anybody else in the camp was impressed by that performance as well. It might benefit him if Jill was on his side.

# ______

“What happened?” Murphy asked as they returned to his tent.

Jill could feel stray tears falling from her eyes. This reminded her of Charlie. “That prick Harrison knew she was scared of spiders. He had been collecting them and flung them all on her at once. She freaked out and ran away...I should have stopped her.”

“This isn’t on you. What happened to Steph wasn’t your fault, Lavy.”

“So...what’s your take on all of this? The grounders, radiation, deadly animals.” Jill asked changing the subject.

“I think that our people are probably the most dangerous here. Do you want me to help bring your stuff to my tent?” Murphy asked.

Jill nodded. It wasn’t even a question if she would stay with him or not. Murphy wouldn’t have accepted a no from her, and she realized this. He didn’t trust all the others in the camp, especially Harrison.

# ______

Bellamy had a conundrum. He had been watching Jill and knew he needed her to help run the camp. She wasn’t emotional like Clarke, or opinionated like Finn, and didn’t have his hot head temper. Jill would balance them out.

He had heard the whispers in camp, some were questioning if following Wells and Clarke was a better option. Having a badass like Jill could aid his cause.

“You seem distracted. What are you thinking about?”

Bellamy turned to face Roma who was sprawled out naked on his bed. He liked Roma, she was happy with no strings attached fun.

“How low on food we are getting.” He said. It was a lie, but he couldn’t tell her the truth. He was sure telling Roma he was thinking about another female would cause some kind of physically pain. “Can you gather another hunting group ready the now?”

“The usual people?”

Bellamy nodded. Roma got dressed as he pondered his next move. He would need to get Jill on her own, so he could talk to her. Dragging her away from Murphy would be a challenge.


	5. 1.04

“Murphy, I’ll be fine. I’m more than capable to go on a hunting trip.” Jill huffed, frustrated.

Bellamy had insisted that Jill join them on their latest hunting trip. Usually Murphy wouldn’t have been concerned with what job she was doing, but this screamed bad idea. Jills bad shoulder would prevent her from actually hunting, or being to protect herself. He had barged in the tent to try and convince her not to go.

“You almost died, twice. So no, you’re not.” Murphy grumbled.

Jill looked down at Murphy who was sitting on the edge of the bed as she leaned forward and kissed him. He was such an argumentative asshole but it was one of the things she liked about him. Murphy never held back on what he thought.

“I thought we were arguing?”

“Oh, we are.” Jill smiled when she saw the smirk creep onto his face. “John, you can’t tell me what to do or-”

“Yes I can, you’re my girl Jilland I’m trying to protect you. Even if you’re too stubborn to see it.”

“So I’m your girl?” Jill asked, feeling her face flush. ‘my girl’ those words made her heart melt.

“Yip. Like it or not, we’re in this together for the long run.” Smirking Murphy pulled her onto his lap. “How sore is it?” He asked gesturing towards her arm still in a sling.

“It’s getting better. Why?” Jill asked, confused.

The stare he was giving her was intense. He looked like a wild animal that was about to pounce on its prey. “I was going to see if you wanted any help to feel better.”

Jill let out a slight moan as Murphy began kissing her neck while he ran a hand up and down her back. She squirmed while straddling him as she felt a heat building in between her legs. Jill pushed Murphy back on the bed as she ground her hips against him, feeling him get hard beneath her before stopping.

“You are such a tease.”

Jill kissed the corner of his mouth. “It’s fun, right?”

Murphy grinned. “You realize you’re playing with fire?”

“Less talking, more stripping.”

Murphy compiled with her demand as Jill got off him, so he could move. He pulled off his own top, before pulling down his trousers. Murphy paused when he looked at Jill, who was just looking at him with an amused smile. She couldn’t undress herself.

Just as Murphy hooked his fingers into the waistband of her trouser, Roma stormed into the tent unannounced.

“Bellamy says we need to go. Now.”

Jill nodded before Roma stormed out. She chuckled at Murphy pouting and kissed him on the cheek. “To be be continued.”

“If you’re lucky.” Murphy said in a matter-of-fact tone. His cockiness only made Jill. “Any point in me asking you to stay again?”

_Oh, so ask not tell now?_ “Nope, there isn’t. Stay out of trouble, John.”

“Don’t die out there, Jill.”

# ______

The hunting trip went from bad to worse in the space of a few split seconds. Jill wished she had listened to Murphy and stayed in camp.

A young girl called Charlotte had followed them into the woods, causing Bellamy to almost kill her. The group had got split up, and now they were running from some kind of acid cloud. Atom had fallen behind, Jill just hoped he found somewhere to hide.

“Quick! In here!” Bellamy yelled, grabbing hold of her shoulder before shoving her into a cave.

“Do you think we will be safe in here?” Charlotte asked.

Bellamy sighed. “I guess so...hey, you’re bleeding.”

Jill looked at her sling to see her shoulder was bleeding through her sling. Shit. “It’s fine. We should try to get some rest.”

Jill leaned against the wall across from Bellamy, as Charlotte lay down further into the cave. The young girl fell asleep fast. Jill couldn’t get comfortable, and also felt uneasy with a pair of brown eyes burning a hole into her.

Noticing she was awake, Bellamy cleared his throat before speaking. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to grab you so rough.”

Jill shrugged. “It’s fine.”

“I’m sure your boyfriend will see it that way.”

Jill could tell Bellamy was just screwing with her by the look on his face. Although he had a point, Murphy wouldn’t be happy. “Why did you insist I come? I can’t hunt, I can’t fight I’m a liability.”

“You are,” He snickered. “I wanted to talk to you, away from the rest of camp.”

“What about?” Jill asked, frowning. She didn’t like that Bellamy hadn’t been upfront with her.

Before Bellamy had time to answer, Charlotte started screaming, causing him to turn his attention to the young girl.

_‘No, No, Jill please make it stop! Please make it stop!’_

“Hey are you okay?”

Jill opened her eyes to see Charlotte staring at her. The young girl looked confused. Jill must have zoned out.

“Yeah..just tiredness catching up to me, sorry. Where’s Bellamy?” She asked, changing the subject.

“He’s outside talking to his friends.”

Jill told Charlotte to wait until she double-checked the area was clear. Stepping further away from the cave, Jill could see Atom dying on the ground. His body was burnt all over. Clarke was humming while stabbing a knife into his neck. _**Mercy kill.**_

# ______

“Lavy! What the hell happened?!” Murphy asked frantically while meeting her at the gate.

He placed a hand on her cheek while watching a body being carried in behind her. Murphy glared at Bellamy as he walked pass them to talk to his sister. Octavia would be so upset when she found out.

Jill leaned in closer to him. “It’s Atom.”

Murphy just nodded. “What happened to you? You’re covered in blood.”

Jill could see Bellamy glancing over at her. “I hurt it while climbing into a cave to get away from the acid fog...I wished I listened to you and stayed.”

Clarke approached them slowly, not wanting to interrupt them. “You should head over to the drop-ship so I can change the gauzes, and make sure the stitches haven’t come loose.”

“No, thanks, John can change it for me.” Jill mumbled before grabbing Murphy’s hand and dragging him towards the tent.

# ***

“Do you want to tell me what that was about?” Murphy finally asked once he finished changing the bloodied bandages.

Jill let out a deep sigh. She was struggling to put her feelings into words. Growing up with parents who didn’t care how you felt had that impact. It had made her uncomfortable with sharing her emotions.

“The acid fog didn’t kill Atom, Clarke did. His body was burnt, and he begged Bellamy to kill him, but he couldn’t, so Clarke did it. She stabbed him in the neck with a knife.” She bit her lip to hold back tears. “It’s just so annoying. People are acting as if she’s some hero for putting him out of his misery, but when...”

“But when you done it you got called a murderer and locked up.” Murphy whispered.

He knew how hard it was to be judged. “I know things haven’t been the easiest since we landed here, but I promise to be better. The hell with Clarke, Finn, Bellamy, all of them. They don’t understand us, it’s just me and you babe.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”

Murphy kisses the crown of her forehead, before sighing. “You’ll always be my girl, no matter how fucked up things become.”

Jill leaned her head against Murphy’s chest. He was correct, it was just the two of them, and she was happy with that.

# ______

“What the fuck! Does nobody know how to knock down here!”

Jill looked up to see Bellamy standing at the flap of the tent. Who quickly turned to face the other way. He hadn’t meant to walk in on her changing.

“Fuck sorry. I was looking for Murphy, but I guess he’s not here.” Bellamy replied in his usual flat tone.

“I’m not sure where he went, probably went off to cause trouble. You can turn round now.” Jill said, still annoyed.

Bellamy took in her appearance. Jill’s face was red with embarrassment. Her hair was nearly tucked under her hat. He guessed the oversized khaki jacket that was flung over her shoulders belonged to Murphy. His eyes dropped to her neck, which was covered in bruise like marks.

“Can I help you with something?” Jill said, wondering why he was still there.

“Yeah...we still need to talk. How would you feel being a leader?”

“A leader of what?” She asked, confused.

Bellamy scoffed, “a leader of this camp.” _Was he crazy?_ “You hate the way things are being done, and now you can do something about.”

Jill shook her head. “Get out.”

“Seriously? At least think about it.” Bellamy said, glaring at her. He wasn’t a person who enjoyed being told no.

“I don’t know what kind of game this is, but I’m not interested in playing. I just want to survive.”

“You want to please Murphy, you mean? He told you not go on the hunting trip, he’s the one holding you back.” Bellamy pointed out.

“John begged me not to leave because he thought I was going to get hurt and guess what? I did. What is it with you? Because you have done one nice thing for me, you think I owe you?” Jill asked in a low voice.

A wicked smile spread across Bellamy’s face. “Don’t flatter yourself love, I got Charlotte into that cave as well.”

“Get the fuck out of my tent!” Jill hissed.

Bellamy grunted before storming out, leaving Jill to wonder what the hell just happened.

# _____

“Bellamy, no! You can’t let them do this!” Jill screamed high as her weak voice would allow her.

One moment she was trying to think of a comeback to Murphy’s crude joke, the next Clarke was storming towards them and was accusing Murphy of murdering Wells.

Jill couldn’t handle the sight in the front of her. John Murphy was going to be hanged. He was going to be killed for a crime he didn’t commit.

“Bellamy, please!” She begged. “Please don’t do this! You know he’s innocent.”

Bellamy made eye contact with her. His brown eyes stared into hers, and for a moment Jill thought he would make them stop. He would cut John down. But she was wrong. Jill screamed in horror as Bellamy kicked Johns only lifeline from underneath him.

“It was me!”

“Charlotte...” the words fell from Jill's lips like a whisper.

Finn and Clarke got John down before he died. Jill rushed to his side to make sure he was okay, but he quickly brushed her aside to threaten the young girl.

Jill glanced at Clarke, who was close to the tears. _Good_. she hoped the blonde feels guilt what she had just started.

# ***

Jill pushed open the flaps of the tent to see Finn stepping in front of Charlotte protectively, as Clarke paced back and forth across the ground.

“Charlotte...how…why would you do this?”

The young girl stepped closer to her. “I was slaying my demons like Bellamy told me.”

“What?” Clarke snapped.

Jill crouched down to her level. “When did he tell you this?”

“When you zoned out.” Jill turned to see Bellamy standing behind her. “Charlotte, this isn’t what I meant when I said that.”

Jill shook her head. The blame game was pointless right now. “We don’t have time for this.” She quipped looking up at Finn, “you guys keep her safe for now, and I’ll go find John and calm him down.”

Clarke cleared her throat. “You better. He’s the reason…”

Jill stepped towards her, “he’s the reason for what Clarke? Almost being hanged? That’s on you, not him. If you had just kept your goddamn mouth shut none of this would be happening!”

Stepping out of the tent, Jill felt a tug on her arm. “Where are you going?”

“I told you, I’m leaving to find John.” Jill pulled her arm back with no luck, “let me go Bellamy.”

“I can’t let you do that.”

# ***

Jill was gasping and panting as she ran towards the yelling. Bellamy had his men drag her back to camp, keeping her locked up in the drop-ship like a prisoner. For what reason? She had no idea.

She arrived at the edge of the cliff just in time to see Charlotte throw herself off it and Bellamy lunging himself at Murphy.

“Bellamy, stop! You’ll kill him!” Clarke screamed as Finn dragging him off.

Jill ignored them arguing as she rushed to John's side. What he had just done was wrong, she couldn’t deny that. But they almost hung him for a crime he didn’t commit, he was pissed.

“I wouldn’t have hurt her.” He spoke barely loud enough for her to hear.

“I know.” Jill replied as she brushed bloodied hair out of his, “You don’t have it in you to kill a kid.”

“Jill, did you hear that?” Finn asked her softly. “Murphy’s banished, if he comes back to camp they will kill him. Bellamy says we need to leave now, and anyone who stays will be banished as well.”

Jill nodded, “can you wist one more minute?”

“No.” Bellamy snapped.

“I’m not talking to you.” Jill hissed, before looking back at John “I’m sorry I couldn’t get them to stop.”

“Where leaving..I hope you change your mind and join us” Clarke said as she walked back towards the forest.

Murphy ran his thumb along Jills cheek, “you need to go back with them Lavy.”

“I don’t want to, I don’t want you to die out here.”

“If I die, I die. Regardless, you still need to go back. How many people more people will be floated for no reason?” He asked.

Jill wiped blood away from his swollen eye. “Since when did you care about others? You always said it was just me and you.”

“In my world, not in yours. You want redemption from what happened on the ark? This is it, and I’m not the only one who knows it.” Murphy pointed behind them to a nearby tree that Finn was leaning against. “He waited on you for a reason, now go.”

Jill pressed her lips softly against his. “I love you John, and we’ll find each other again. Our story is far from over.”

“I love you too Lavy, may we meet again.”


	6. 1.05

“We had no other choice!” Clarke was still struggling to convince Jill that they had to banish Murphy.

“Go fuck yourself!” Jill replied, walking past her.

Without thinking, Clarke grabbed her wrist to trying to stop her from running away. The blonde wasn’t meaning to be aggressive; she was just fed up with people not listening to her. “I thought you wanted to work together? We need to talk to do that.”

Jill turned and glared at her. “What the fuck do you want from me? Forgiveness? Because you will not get it. I only agreed to come back to stop you and that Bellamy from floating any more incident people.”

“It was for the best” Finn said calmly holding by the blonde's side, “and it wasn’t all her fault.”

“Really? Because from where I’m standing, it looks like it was. You found the knife and Bellamy warned you what would happen, and you Clarke, you ignored it. He got hanged because of you! If you had just kept you’re fucking mouth shut, none of this would have happened. Charlotte is dead because of you, not Murphy.”

Clarke shook her head, “that’s not fair.”

“Fair? You don’t have a clue about what an unfair life is like. All those higher ups on the ark sent us here to die after years of torture. And I’m the idiot for thinking you were different, but you’re not. You are just a mini Abby.” Jill hissed before shaking her head while storming off.

“What do you mean a mini Abby?” Clarke shouted after her confused. The blonde wasn’t even aware that Jill knew her mom.

# ______

“Do you want to eat with us?” Monty asked, giving Jill the same sympathetic look that he always did.

“No, I’m fine, but thank you” Jill answered smiling.

Monty was one of the few people she now spoke to, along with Jasper and Octavia. Miller sometimes made small talk with her, but Jill felt it was more out of politeness than anything else.

Octavia suddenly stood up and pointed towards the night sky. “Guys are you seeing this? Bellamy! Come look quick!”

Jill turned to see Roma and Bree exiting Bellamy’s. She rolled her eyes and twisted to see at the sky again. _Good to see he’s taking his leader position seriously._ “I think we should go investigate it.”

“No.” Bellamy answered, shaking his head.

“I wasn’t asking your permission, Bellamy.” Jill snapped back. “Whatever has just fallen from the sky will attract grounders and god knows what else. If it’s supplies, we should get to it first.”

“She’s right, Bell,” Octavia chimed in. “We should go look before...”

“I said no, O. We need to wait until morning, it’s too dangerous at night.”

Jill shared a look with Octavia before following her brother into his tent. She stopped when she thought he hadn’t noticed her presence. Being alone with him made her nervous. Jill hated Bellamy she found him intimidating.

“See something you like, princess?”

His question caused Jill to frown. “Don’t call me Clarke’s nickname, and no I see nothing I like.”

Bellamy turned to face her grinning, “If you wanted to spend the night in my tent you could have just said.” His cocky grin faded when he saw the serious look on Jills face. “Is something wrong?”

“I’m onto you Blake. I don’t buy the act you are putting on for everyone else, there is another reason you want to wait until morning.”

Bellamy didn’t know if he should be mad or not. He didn’t like Jill sticking her noise into his personal business, but he had to give her credit. Jill was a lot smarter than she let on to others. She was the only one who could see through him.

“You aren’t even going to deny it?”

Bellamy shook his head. “Would there be any point? Even if I told you the truth, you still wouldn’t believe me.”

Jill shrugged, “true.”

“Fine. In the morning I will come and get you before I leave to go looking for the pod, okay?” Bellamy asked before falling onto his makeshift bed.

“Whatever you say Blake, I’ll see you in the morning, I guess.” Jill said before turning to leave his tent.

“Unless you just want to spend the night in here.”

Jill didn’t respond to his childish comment. She knew what men like Bellamy Blake were like, and she would not become another notch on his bedpost. Besides, she wasn’t over Murphy.

# ______

“What did you just throw away?”

Bellamy jumped when he heard Jills voice behind him. She was incredibly quiet and creepy. Had she been following him the full time? Of course, she had.

“What are you doing out here? Stretching your legs?” He asked innocently.

“Don’t screw me around, Blake. I knew you would leave on you’re own, my question is why? What are you hiding?” Jill asked, stepping closer to him.

Before Bellamy had time to answer, the unconscious brunette he left on the pod was storming towards him.

"Hey! Shooter! Where's my radio?"

Clarke and Finn closely followed the brunette. Jill huffed, she didn’t have time for this. All she wanted to find out was what Bellamy was hiding.

Bellamy glared at her, before throwing her against a tree. “I shoulda killed you when I had the chance.”

The brunette put a knife to his throat. "Really? Well I'm right here. Where is my radio?"

_Radio?_ Son of a bitch. Jill zoned out while listing to how Bellamy shot Jaha and everything he had done was for his own selfish reasons. Murphy was right, she cared about what happened to the people on the ark, and now I sounded like they would all die because of Bellamy fucking Blake.

“Could you make flares?” Jill asked, finally speaking up.

“Of course I could, why?” The brunette replied, looking directly at her.

Jill shifted uncomfortably feeling four sets of eyes on her. “We don’t need to speak to the ark, we just need to let them know we are here.”

# ***

Jill done her best to not let out a sigh of frustration. Clarke had left with the new girl Raven to go look in a secret bunker that her and Finn found previously, which meant she was left walking back to camp with Bellamy and Finn.

“Have you heard anything from Murphy?” Finn asked, most likely trying to break the awkward tension.

“Yeah, we exchange letters weekly with the prison pen pal program.” Jill said sarcastically.

Bellamy let out a grunt, “She wouldn’t tell us, anyway.”

“Of course I haven’t seen him! And if I had the last person I would tell would be either of you hypocrites!” Jill yelled before walking in front of them. A few moments later she turned to look at the person now next to her, “Murphy wouldn’t have hurt Charlotte. He just wanted to scare her.”

“He definitely did that” Finn said raising his eyebrows. “We are both in predicaments, I guess.”

“They are completely different situations. You had sex with Clarke, and now your girlfriend turns up you feel bad? I love Murphy, and he was banished and threatened to be killed if he returned.” Jill felt awful after pointing out the differences. She wasn’t trying to be cruel, just truthful, Finn caused his own problems.

“Do you ever wish you stayed with him?”

Jill felt the tears start to build behind her eyes. “Every day. I tried to do the right thing by staying, but so far I’ve not done any good.”

Finn gave her a soft smile “you have, you might not release it, but you help people all the time.”

“I hope things work out with your love triangle.” Jill offered Finn a smile, before they both started laughing, irritating Bellamy who stormed past them.

# ______

At night they stood by watching lights flashing across the black sky. It didn’t work. Jill looked at Bellamy and saw the devastation on his face. He never meant for this to happen. Her gaze then fell to Finn wrapping his arm around Raven, he must have made his choice.

Clarke stepped beside Bellamy, “would you wish on it if it was a shooting stat?”

Bellamy never answered straight away, but his eyes landed on Jill. “I wouldn’t even know what to wish for. She’d want Murphy back though.” He ignored the strange look Clarke gave him before a head of brown hair was rushing towards him.

“This is all your fault!” Raven said, marching towards Bellamy. “None of this wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t stolen my damn radio.”

Jill surprised everyone, including herself by defending Bellamy. “He knows, alright? Nothing will change what has happened.”

Raven glared at her. “The big hero over here says it done it all for his sister, but he's done it for himself and now all those people are dead.”

_**Wait, Octavia.** _

“Bellamy when was the last time you saw Octavia?” Jill asked, worried.

“I..I don’t know. Has anyone seen Octavia?!” He yelled.

Mumbles broke out among them, but nobody had a straightforward answer for where she was. Octavia was officially missing.


	7. 0.06

“Clarke and Raven will be fine. Stop wasting time and go find Bellamy!” Jill scorned Finn, before walking away shaking her head.

The sooner Bellamy left, the faster they would find Octavia. A small group of delinquents had agreed to join him, however Finn seemed reluctant. Regardless of what he wanted, Finn needed to go, he was the best tracker in the camp.

“What do we do if the grounders come?” Some kid asked Bellamy.

Bellamy glanced between Clarke and the younger boy standing in front of him. “Ask Jill, while I’m away she’s in charge.” 

_What?_ Jill stood frozen for a moment not knowing what to say. Was he joking? It would be a lot of pressure to be in charge herself. However, she was amused by the look on Clarke’s face. The blonde didn’t look impressed.

“What? I...um” Jill stared into Bellamy’s brown eyes and knew this wasn’t the time to argue with him. No matter how much she didn’t agree with him. “What is your name?”

“Brad.”

Jill could feel Bellamy’s eyes burning a hole into her. “We will deal with that problem if the time comes, but until anything happens, we work like normal. The wall still has three holes that need to be repaired, we’ll start there.”

Satisfied with that answer, Bellamy called for the rest of his group to follow him. Jill just hoped they found Octavia alive, and didn’t run into trouble.

# ______

“What happened?” Jill asked, running towards the gate.

“It’s a long story, but Finn got stabbed and needs help now.” Octavia said before going to find Clarke. 

Bellamy entered the gate after carrying a limp Finn in his arms. Quickly taking him into the drop-ship before disappearing.

The blonde turned to face her, “Jill, I’m going to need your help. I can’t do this on my own.”

“Okay, what can I do?”

“I need you to help Raven.” Clarke said while cleaning Finn’s wound as best she could.

Jill nodded before heading to towards the brunette.

Raven was trying to contact the ark. “Calling Ark station. Come -- to -- Ark station.” The brunette let out a loud grunt before trying again. “Are you there? Please come in. I repeat, calling Ark station. The 100 are alive. Can anyone hear me?”

_**“This is a restricted channel. Who is this? Please identify yourself.”** _

Jill almost squealed in delight. “This is Raven Reyes and Jill Slate. We are transmitting from the ground. The 100 are alive. Please, you need to get Dr. Abby Griffin. Dr. Abby Griffin, now.”

_**”Hang on, Raven. We're trying to boost your signal. Get her off the Ark-wide channel, this room only. Copy?”** _

“Clarke, we have got it!” Jill shouted before Brad entered the room. “Everything okay?”

He stepped forward, with a worried look on his face. “A part of the wall is crumbling because of the storm, we are struggling to keep it up.”

Jill gulped down. “Okay, Raven, I’ll be back shortly.” She followed the kid out to the wall to see the damaged that the storm had done. 

“I’ll go round to the other side, then we can try to patch the hole again!” Jill shouted over the wind and heavy rainfall.

Jill felt uneasy once she went outside the gate, the feeling of being watching washed over her. ‘I’m just being paranoid’ she mumbled to herself. _Just paranoid, nothing else._ After patching the wall, Jill stepped back to getting a better look at the wall when a crunching noise coming from behind her caught her attention.

“Is someone there?!” She yelled. The footsteps stopped. Somebody was there, watching. Not knowing what else to do, Jill attempt to run for the gates, only to be knocked to the ground.

# _____

Jill let out a loud groan of pain as she opened her eyes. Jill tried to rub her face but couldn’t, her hands were chained to a wall.

Frantically she pulled at the chains but only ended up hurting herself. “Fuck!” She hissed in defeat as blood ran from the wound off her head.

“Yu are awake Skai person” A women said entering the ‘room’. She was tall and dressed in what Jill imagined what warriors wore. 

“Let me go! I have done nothing to you!”

“Skaikru burnt Ai village gon graun. Yu sent faya ona nat Skai” The women hissed. _’The sky people burnt my village to the ground. You sent fire into the night sky.’_

“I don’t know what you are saying!” Jill yelled as tears spilled down her face. She realized what was going on, grounders had kidnapped her.

“Ignorance!” The grounder snapped.

Jill said nothing. What could she say? Please let me go? They would either laugh at her suffering, or kill her.

# ______

“Where the hell have you been?” Raven yelled soon as she saw Jill stumble through the gates.

“Not now” Jill scoffed. A few kids had noticed her appearance, but continued to work as normal. Rumors had spread that Jill had left to find Murphy.

Jill had been missing for almost two days. When she woke up that morning her chains were gone, so she took the opportunity and escaped. Dizzy and confused, she had somehow found her way back to camp.

Raven frowned before speeding up behind her, “Can you just stop and tell me what happened? You need to let Clarke look at you. Bellamy and Finn have gone looking for you. Where the hell have you been?”

Raven wanted to yell at Jill for having them so worried, but taking in the other girl's appearance, she couldn’t stay mad. Something bad had happened to her. Jill had cuts and bruises on her neck, arms, legs, stomach, and face that showed through her ripped and dirty clothes.

“Did you hit your head?” Raven reached her hand out to touch the blood covered cloth that was wrapped around Jills head.

“Don’t!” Jill said flinching.

Raven opened her mouth to say something when Octavia towards them and hugged the injured girl. 

“I was so worried about you, Lavy! Where did you go?”

Jill scrunched up her nose as her eyes ran over the person standing in front of her. It looked like Octavia, but something was wrong. Her vision was going blurry.

“Hey, are you okay?” Raven asked, stepping closer, “do you want to sit back down? You don’t look too good.”

“Raven, get Clarke now, something isn’t right.” Octavia put her arm over Jills bruised and bloodied body before helping her head towards the drop-ship. An injured Jill swayed as she walked.

Suddenly Jill slipped from Octavia’s grasp and landed on the ground with a thud. 

“Oh, my god.” Clarke said, running out towards them with Raven alongside her.

“She just collapsed!” Octavia explained. “Look, there is blood coming from her ears and nose.”

“Shh. She’s trying to say something” Raven said, crouching down next to her, so she could hear the girls' whispers.

“What did she tell you?” Clarke asked, concerned.

“Grounders, she said the grounders took her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there isn’t much Bellamy or Murphy in this chapter, but they will be featured more in the upcoming chapters.


	8. 0.07

“Stop!” 

Bellamy frowned at Clarke, who was yelling and waving her arms at him to stop. “What?”

“You can’t go into her tent, we don’t know what’s wrong with her.”

Bellamy shook his head and entered Jills tent, regardless. She looked like death. He crouched down, so he was level with her. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

Jill groaned in response. The grounders had beat her, and most likely poisoned her. At least that’s what Clarke said happened. She couldn’t remember. She had been throwing up, shaking and sweating. And occasionally her ears, nose, and eyes bled. Jill had been isolating in her tent ever since. Octavia would drop food and water off for her, and would sit on the other side of the tent and would talk to her about anything that popped into her tent. 

Jill opened her eyes. “How’s it going, Blake?”

Bellamy smiled at her. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?”

Shrugging in response, Jill fought the urge to throw up. “How many days have I been out for?”

“Just a couple.” Bellamy cleared his throat before talking again. “Me and Clarke are going to look for supplies in an underground bunker I found, I just wanted to check you would be alright.”

Jill nodded. “Yeah, I’ll be fine, if I wasn’t quarantined I would have gone with you. Speaking of which, how did you get in here? Blondie has been acting like a bodyguard, she wouldn’t even let O in to see me.”

Bellamy scoffed. “Do you really think I’d let Clarke Griffin tell me what to do?”

“Yes. You have a soft spot for her, Blake, and you can’t even deny it.” Jill smirked before coughing up more blood. “Where is Octavia, anyway? I haven’t heard from her in a while.”

“She’s guarding the grounder.” Bellamy shook his head. “I keep telling her to stay away from him, but she’s convinced-“

Jill stared at him with a blank expression, before cutting Bellamy off. “What grounder?”

_Oh._ “I thought Octavia told how Finn was poisoned.” Bellamy felt the guilt wash over him, he wasn’t looking forward to telling Jill what happened. “We went back to where we found my sister and kidnapped the grounder.”

Jill shot up, horrified. “What? You stole another person? What the hell is wrong with you!”

“We did it to save Finn. He poisoned the blade that he stabbed him with. All we wanted was the antidote...then Clarke suggested he knew what happened to you.”

“Please tell me you torture him because of me?” Jill practically pleaded.

Bellamy stood up. “I don’t have time for this. We done what had to, and that’s the end of it. try to stay alive, the camp needs you. Octavia needs you.”

Jill watched as Bellamy quickly disappeared from her sight. She cursed at him under her breath. As soon as she was feeling better, she was definitely going to kick his ass.

# ______

Staggering out of her tent, it surprised Jill to see the rest of the delinquents running around wild. She tried to ask Jasper what was going on, but he almost took her eye out with his ‘anti-Grounder stick’.

“Hey, Monty? What’s happening?” 

Monty walked over to Jill and cupped her cheeks with both hands. He looked at her wide-eyed, with a serious expression on his face. “I'm pretty sure I ate a pine cone because it told me to.”

_Right. He was high._ Jill nodded and headed towards the drop-ship to look for Octavia. Once on the level the grounder was on Jill was surprised to see the grounder and Octavia kissing.

Jill cleared her throat to alert them to her presence.

Octavia jumped back away from him. “Lav! Oh my god, this isn’t-”

“Yeah, Yeah, I get it. You are helping him escape.” Jill sighed. _Bellamy is going to kill me._ “You guys better hurry before Clarke and your brother returns. Then you can explain why everybody is high.”

Jill hopped back down and let out a groan. Her body was still stiff and sore from laying in her tent for days. If Clarke was here, Jill was sure she still would have been confined to her tent.

“Hey!” She hissed as some boy stumbled past her, grabbing her hat.

Jill frowned and quickly tucked her hair back underneath. Hoping that nobody noticed.

# ______

Jill squeezed her eyes shut, hearing the flaps to her tent opening. She knew who it was, and why he was there.

“I know you are awake Lav, you don’t need to pretend.”

Jill groaned and opened her eyes, sitting upright. It was pitch black, but she could still see the pissed expression on Bellamy’s face.

“You helped the grounder escape, didn’t you?” He asked through gritted teeth.

“No... I just saw him leave and did nothing to stop him.” Jill was technically lying, but she wasn’t about to tell him that she caught Octavia kissing the grounder he tortured. “Anything else? Because if you hadn’t noticed, it’s the middle of the night, and you shouldn’t be in here.”

Bellamy scoffed. “I know you left the tent. Jasper said he was so high that he imagined seeing someone's hair the color of the pretty flowers outside the gate.”

Jill gulped down. “Napellus flowers are actually poisonous.”

Bellamy shook his head and sighed. He was certain Jill was covering up for his sister, and would just keep changing the subject to do so. “The grounders are dangerous, I thought you of all people would know that.”

“Really? Because I’m not so sure. The grounder YOU tortured stabbed Finn in self-defence, and saved you’re sister. You tried to float Murphy over a crime he didn’t commit.” All the anger Jill had towards Clarke and Bellamy had been bubbling under the surface, ready to explode. “We are more dangerous than them. Can’t you see that? What’s the difference between what you have done to that grounder and what they have done to me?”

Bellamy felt as if someone had hit him in the chest. He couldn’t answer her question, because nothing was different. He had originally come to tell Jill that Jaha had pardoned him of his friend, but right now he didn’t think Jill would care what happened to him.”

“I’m going to go. We can work out the next step tomorrow.” He sighed before turning to leave the tent.

“Fine.”

Jill frowned and flopped back down. The next few days would be eventful.


	9. 0.08

Jasper was by far Jills favorite person on the planet, well he was long as he kept supplying ‘Unity Juice’. She had never tasted alcohol until today. At first, she cringed at the taste it left in her mouth, but now Jill was enjoying it.

Jill was currently sitting with Sterling, Fox, Miller and Clarke playing drinking games. Although she still hadn’t forgiven Clarke for banishing Murphy, the liquor was making her more bearable.

“Truth or dare, Lav?” Fox asked in a slur.

Jill shrugged, “truth.”

“What do you always wear a hat? Are you bald underneath?”

Jill finished her drink before answering. “Because I want to, and I’m not bald underneath.” 

Miller let out a snort. “You are so bad at this game, I’m banning you from saying truth again.”

She let out a chuckle and waited for it to be her turn again. Sterling, and Miller both choose dares before it was Clark’s turn. Jill watched everyone having fun. Unity day wasn’t so bad on earth. The only downside was Murphy missing it. She couldn’t have imagined the drama a drunk John Murphy would have caused.

“No, absolutely not.”

Jill snapped out of her trance when she heard Clark’s usual authoritative tone. _What was she moaning about now?_

“Slate wouldn’t care,” Fox said, pointing towards you. “Unless you are chicken, Griffin.”

“Wait, what's the dare?” Jill asked.

Clarke was pouting when Jill turned to face her. “They want me to kiss you.” _Oh._ “But they think I’m too scared.”

Jill didn’t know how much Clarke had drank, but she imaged it was a lot if she was about to fall for the ‘prove us wrong’ act. Jill was about to point out how stupid the dare was when she felt Clarke crashing her lips against her own.

_Okay, how drunk am I?_ Jill somehow found herself not pulling away straight away. Why hadn’t Clarke pulled away yet? The kiss was lasting far too long.

A coughing noise caused Clarke to pull away. Both girls turned to see Finn staring at them. He looked pissed. “I need you both for a moment, if you can find a moment to stop making out with each other.”

Jill and Clarke shared a look both of them trying not to laugh. They weren’t sure if it was the alcohol, or Finn being so angry but something in the air was making them laugh uncontrollably.

# ______

To say the walk to meet Anya was uncomfortable, was an understatement. Finn had been in a moon ever since you left camp.

“The Ark is about survival at any cost. You know, kill people who fall out of line. When those people get down here, if they feel threatened they will start a war.”

Jill rolled her eyes as Finn rambled on. Her head was hurting, and she was far too stressed to listen to them bicker.

Clarke let out a sigh of frustration. “Seriously, Finn, you're putting a lot of faith in a guy who stuck a knife in you.”

Finn scrunched his face up at the comment. “And you're sounding more and more like Bellamy.”

“I'm just trying to keep us alive Finn.”

“So am I.”

Jill stopped walking and turned to face both of them. “Guys, shut up. We don’t have time for this, okay? And for the record, I trust Lincoln as well. He saved Octavia, and he only stabbed Finn in self-defence.”

Looking past Finn and Clarke, Jill could see the figures of three of her camp mates approaching from the trees. Finn wasn’t aware that his girlfriend, along with Bellamy, and Jasper were coming for backup. Jill shared a small smile with Bellamy as he smirked at her.

When reaching the bridge, Jill noticed Octavia and Lincoln waiting for them. Jill smiled as Clarke questioned the younger Blake.

Clarke shook her head in disbelief. “So, that's how you set this up? You helped him escape, didn't you?”

“Easy Griffin,” Jill said, stepping in between them. “Octavia has already mentioned she trusts him, and we are here now. Let’s just see how this plays out.”

Lincoln stepped to the edge of the brick bridge. “Anya is approaching now. It will offend her that you still have weapons.”

Jill handed her knife over to Finn, before going to Clarke to join Anya on the bridge. Truthfully, Jill did not know why Anya wanted to meet with her. She understood her wanting to meet Clarke, but her? That made no sense.

Jill and Clarke extended a hand each to Anya. The Trikru warrior shook, looked them both up and down, before shaking Jill’s hand and ignoring Clarke.

The grounder stopped walking and glanced at them. “Your name is Clarke?”

“Yes, and this is-”

“I’m Anya.” The grounder spoke, cutting Clarke off. “And I know who Jill of Skaikru is.”

Jill gulped down as Clarke started speaking. “I think we got off to a rough start. But we want to find a way to live together, in peace.”

Anya scoffed. “I understand? You started a war that you don't know how to end.”

Jill studded Anya’s face. _What have we done?_ “We never meant to cause any harm. We didn’t know anybody was down here, we thought all of humanity had died.”

Clarke wasn’t accepting that they created a war. “What? No, we didn't start anything. You attacked us for no reason.” 

The grounder shared a look with the grounders who was standing behind her. Her own backup. “No reason? The missiles you launched burnt a village to the ground.”

“The flares?” Jill said as the realization stuck her.

“No, that was a signal meant for our families. We had no idea . . ." Clarke gasped.

Anya’s tone was getting louder and more aggressive as she spoke. “Your invaders. Your ship landed in our territory.”

“This is because of what happened to Lincoln, isn’t it?” Jill asked.

Anya nodded. Clarke wasn’t impressed. “Grounders took Jill, it’s even.”

“Even?” Anya asked harshly.

Jill shook her head. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She and Clarke were meant to fix this situation, stopping any more violence from happening. “I’m not mad,” Jill said, gaining attention from both women. “What your people done to me was unspeakable, but so is what my people done to Lincoln. He didn’t deserve that, and for that I’m sorry.”

“My men informed you had the opportunity to kill them when you escaped, but didn’t.” Jill felt her face burn as Anya spoke. “Why didn’t you?”

Jill chewed on her bottom lip as she thought of a reasonable answer that wouldn’t make her seem weak. In the end, she went with the truth. “I’m not comfortable taking a human life.”

Anya opened her mouth to reply when a gun was fired. Jill ducked down, grabbing Clarke with her. Neither of them sure where the gunshot came from.

The grounders began yelling in their native language. _Shit._ They had to leave.

“Run!”

Jill and Clarke raced back across the bridge, and meet up with their people all seven of them rushed back to camp. 

With her previous stab wound aching, Jill slowed down and was falling behind the rest quickly. Bellamy noticed and gripped her hand to drag her along with him. Scared she would fall behind and killed.

# ______

Returning to camp wasn’t easy, but the group managed with no major injuries except for Jill’s stitches opening up.

Bellamy helped Jill stand as she had become weak with exhaustion and pain. The previous alcohol working its way through her systems didn’t help either.

Finn and Clarke had been arguing since they returned, Finn blamed Jill and Clarke for what happened since they brought backup. A decision both girls stood firmly by. Raven was upset because Finn didn’t tell her about it. As they argued, Bellamy wrapped his arm around Jill’s waist to help her stand better and was surprised to feel something wet pressing against his bare arm.

“What I want to know is why Anya seems to like Jill more than Clarke.” Raven said directly at Jill. “Are you another one with connections to the grounders?” 

Octavia opened her mouth to respond when Bellamy cut her off. “Enough! We don’t have time for this.” Bellamy pulled Jill’s jacket to reveal the blood soaking through to her top. “Clarke, she’s needs medical attention now.”

“Oh god, get her to the drop-ship now!” The blonde said frantically. Clarke felt guilty of not noticing sooner.

“What was that?” Jill asked weakly, while pointing at the sky.

Most of the camp now noticed the second drop-ship that was coming to earth. A few cheers of happiness could be heard before Clarke spoke. “Something's wrong, it’s coming in to fast.”

At the same tome the sonic blast happened, Jill passed out. Bellamy caught her and held her bridal style in his arms. “Clarke, I’m sorry about your mom, but you need to help.”

Clarke blinked away her tears and headed towards the drop-ship with only one thought going through her mind. Her mom was dead.


	10. 0.09

“She was falling behind. I did what I had to.”

Jill could practically hear how the young man rolled his eyes as he spoke. No wonder the delinquents had been following his orders like a faithful and helpless servants ever since they landed. Bellamy could sound authoritative when he wanted to.

Sitting up with a groan, Jill opened her eyes to see Bellamy and Octavia both sitting in her tent. She could tell they had bickering about something, Bellamy’s jaw was clenched, and the younger Blake was pouting. “If the wind changes, your face will stay like that O.”

Octavia smiled at her friend before nodding her arm playfully. “Nice to see you too Lavy, how are you feeling?”

“Sore, but I’ll live. What’s been going on here?” The Blake’s shared a look that let Jill know something bad had happened. _Wasn’t that always the case?_ The loud boom. “The second drop-ship?”

“No survivors.” Bellamy answered bluntly.

“Oh god.” Jill gasped. She was about to ask if they learned who died when she remembered who Clarke’s mom was. She didn’t want to know if Abby Griffin had lived or died.

Octavia stood from her perch on Jill’s bed. “I’m going to let Clarke know you are awake, Bell keep an eye on her.”

The moment Octavia left the tent the awkward tension took over. Jill pulled at the threads of the thin blanket that was covering her. She could feel Bellamy’s glare burning a hole into her. His anger was now aimed at her.

Jill counted the minutes until he finally snapped at her. They lasted two minutes. “Why didn’t you tell me? Or Finn?”

“Tell you what?” She asked, confused.

Bellamy made a tutting noise before continuing. “How badly the grounders hurt you. You have cuts and bruises all over your arms and legs that you hid, not to mention the stab wound.”

“It was my decision to go, I wanted to help.” She shrugged, “all we did was make it worse and-”

“You didn’t make it worse. Anya seemed to respect you, we can use it to our advantage.” Jill scoffed at his comment. “You don’t think so? She shook your hand. She likes you more than Clarke.”

Jill tilted her head to the side, “comparing me to the princess?”

Bellamy grinned at her and shrugged. It was rare for them to share a moment together that wasn’t full of arguments and arguments. Bellamy cupped Jill's face and ran his thumb over her cheek. He cleared his throat to say something but was cut off by his sister yelling. She wanted him and Jill to go to the drop-ship right away.

# ______

“John!” Jill yelled before kneeling beside a wounded Murphy. He looked like he’d been to hell and back. John opened his eyes and acknowledged Jill’s presence.

Jill was so focused on Murphy that she almost missed the conversation happening behind her. _**“We hanged him, we banished him, and now we're going to kill him. Get the Hell out of my way.”**_ Jill jumped to her feet and spun to see Bellamy pointing his gun at Murphy while Finn tried to stop him.

Bellamy clenched his jaw when he saw Jill stepping in front of him, “Move.”

“No.”

“Move out of my road.” He barked, Jill folded her arms and blocked him every time he tried to move. “Be smart about this, Lav.”

“You aren’t killing!” Jill snapped, while smacking the gun out of his hand. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Clarke stepping towards Murphy. “Don’t even think about its princess.

Clarke put her hands up defensively and stepped back. “I just want to know what happened.”

“What happened?” Jill scrunched her face up at the question. “You and Bellamy tossed him out to the grounders that’s what happened! They tore off his goddamn fingernails!”

Bellamy looked at her blankly. “We need to know what happened.”

Jill let out a sigh of defeat. “I’ll speak to him, but you two have to leave.”

# ______

Murphy had his head rested against Jills chest as she ran her hair through his fingers. They had spoken little since Bellamy and Clarke left. Jill didn’t want to push him for information about what the grounders did to him. She already had a rough idea.

“Get into any trouble while I was away?” Murphy asked in between coughing fits.

Jill wasn’t sure what to say to him, “I got drunk and kissed the princess.”

Murphy turned his head and looked up at her. “Was she a better kisser than me?”

She chuckled at his comment and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “She wasn’t. Nobody is a better kisser than you.”

“Good. Now tell me about you making out with another girl.” Murphy let a smile briefly spread across his face as he felt Jill vibrate with laughter. The noises she made was enough for him to finally fall asleep.

# ______

It traumatized Murphy. He could have sworn his heart stopped beating when he saw Jill being brought back into the drop-ship. She had left to get something from her tent and didn’t return until she was being carried in. She looked dead. Clarke assured him she was alive, but he still wasn’t so sure. 

“You care for her, don’t you?”

He didn’t respond to Octavia question; the girl talked far too often for his liking. He was scared to take his eyes off Jill, in case she began choking again.

“Why didn’t you come back for her?”

“Do you ever stop talking?” He snapped, shaking his head.

Octavia let out a small laugh. “It seems you have a soul after all.” The dark-haired girl looked him up and down, “The grounders really did a number on you.”

“Observant.”

Octavia raised her eyes. “Jill looked worse when she came back, I honestly thought she was going to die. This will be the third time I’ve almost lost her.”

“What do you mean she looked worse?” Murphy asked, confused. “Did...did they take her?”

“Oh, um…” Octavia mentally slapped herself, she just assumed somebody would have told Murphy. “They took her.”

Murphy shook his head as he wiped Jill's face with a damp cloth. To his relief, the color had returned to her cheeks. “What did they do to her?”

“Stabbed her, pulled her toe nails off, cut her arms and legs. Jill said they kept asking her questions, but she didn’t understand what they said to her.” Octavia gulped down seeing the look on Murphy’s face. It was obvious her friend meant a lot to him. “She’s given my brother and Clarke hell for banishing you. They had a meeting with the grounders and their leader shook Jill's hand and ignored Clarke.”

_What?_ As Octavia continued to tell Murphy everything that happened since they banished him. He couldn’t believe how much Jill had accomplished on her own. “Wow, she’s been busy.”

“Yeah, but she’s missed you like crazy.”

“Why are you telling me this? We aren’t friends. Bellamy has tried to kill me multiple times, I’ll no doubt be banished again after this.” Murphy finally took his eyes off Jill to stare at Octavia while waiting for an answer.

“Jill is my friend, my only friend, and I want her to be happy.” Octavia glanced down at Jill. “You make her happy, and for the record, I don’t agree with what happened that day. I’m still pissed at you wanting to kill Jasper, but I never wanted you to get floated.”

Murphy opened his mouth to respond when more delinquents got brought into the drop-ship, including Bellamy. Octavia rushed to her brother's side, leaving Murphy on his own. He tucked a stay stand of purple hair back underneath her hat. He wished she was awake, so they could talk so badly, Murphy wanted to tell her so many things. That he was sorry about what happened with Charlotte, he was sorry for being such a dick when they landed, and he wanted to apologize in advance for what he was about to do.

# ______

Jill woke to the sounds of snoring around her, apparently she wasn’t the only one of caught the virus. The last thing she remembered was walking outside and suddenly feeling faint before throwing up blood. She was losing count of how many times she’d almost died on earth.

Quietly she slid off the table and began looking for Murphy. Making her way through the drop-ship she was shocked to see Bellamy among the infected. He was thankfully sound asleep. Hearing a muffled noise in the other direction, she headed towards it.

She was startled to see Murphy leaning over somebody. Jill wanted to get his attention but didn’t want to wake anybody else up.

“Bygones.”

Jill watched in horror as Murphy threw a damp cloth on the ground and attempted to walk away. He froze on the spot when he saw her. Her eyes filled with tears as she realized what he had just down, Murphy had just killed someone.


	11. 10

The forest was eerily quiet. The group of four had hardly spoken a word to each other as they searched for potential food sources. 

Myles was walking slightly ahead of them as Jill trailed behind. She couldn’t get the secrets she was hiding out of her mind. Murphy had killed someone. Her Murphy, done that. Even the thought of it made her physically feel sick. Jill chose not tell anyone what she knew in case he was banished again, or worse. She was sure Bellamy would kill him if he found out.

Finn stepped back from Clarke and waited until Jill was next to him before walking again. “Hey, you seemed rather distant before. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah,” She gulped down. “I-I just need to pee really bad. I’ll catch up with you guys in a moment.”

Finn shrugged and caught up with Clarke, while Jill stepped behind a large tree. She just needed a moment to herself. _Focus, she just needed to focus._ Taking a deep breath she readied herself to join the others when she heard somebody yelling in pain. Slowly she creeped her head around the tree to see Myles laying on the ground with an arrow sticking out of his leg, just as Jill was about to help him grounders appeared behind Clarke and Finn. 

Anya? _Shit._ Jill froze on the stop as she tried to figure out what to do. What could she do? She wasn’t a fighter and the grounders would easily kill her if she tried to attack, the best thing she could do was get more people. She blinked away tears while watching Finn and Clarke being dragged away.

A rustling sound coming from behind alerted her to someone’s presence. Without thinking she pulled her knife out, and spun and spun around. A grounder swung his sword at her, cutting Jill on the wrist. She let out a scream of pain as he kicked her to the ground, not knowing what else to do Jill stabbed him in the leg with her knife. When the grounder stumbled forward she removed the knife from his leg and stabbed him in the neck. 

Jill watched in horror as the grounder fell forward, with blood pouring from his neck. He was dead. She had killed him.

She quickly started running back towards camp, praying she didn’t run into another grounder.

# ______

Soon as Jill got back to camp she ran toward Bellamy’s tent, and barged in unannounced. “Bellamy!” 

The sight of a topless Bellamy and Raven redressing took her by surprise. Granted, she should have called out before entering, but Jill never would have imagined walking in on them post sex.

Bellamy stood with his mouth agape while Raven took on her friend’s appearance. She was covered in blood. “What happened?”

Jill took a step back as Raven tried to reach out to her, she shot the brunette a glare before turning to face Bellamy. “Me and Myles got attacked by grounders, while Clarke and **_Finn_** got kidnapped.”

“What?” Bellamy stepped forward. “Do you know where they took them?” 

“No.”

“How can you not know?” Raven added. “You must have seen what direction they went off in.”

Jill clenched her jaw. “Unlike you, I was a little busy trying not to die.”

Bellamy sighed, “Jill we-”

“Don’t just don’t.” She spat, “once you're done screwing other people’s girlfriends you need to help me find them.”

Jill stormed out of the tent, not giving either of them a chance to reply. She took a few deep breaths before looking down at her cut wrist, she had ripped her jacket and used the fabric to try and stop the bleeding, unfortunately it hadn’t worked. The realisation of what happened suddenly stuck her like a ton of bricks. 

She glanced around the camp while looking for Murphy. Regardless of everything that had happened she needed him. Not being able to see his face she started to panic. 

“John!” She called out. “John!”

When Murphy didn’t appear she started to check the different areas. She was worried that he’d left after her to hunt for food. The type of panic she was feeling was nothing she’d ever experienced before. Tears stung her eyes while she began to feel dizzy, as her breathing became hitched. Stepping out of the water tent she saw Raven and Bellamy both giving her a worried look, she ignored them. 

She scratched at her hat frantically feeling how itchy her head had become underneath with sweat, then the thought occurred to her. She hadn’t checked her own tent.

She sprinted towards it and swung the flaps open to see Murphy sleeping. 

“John,” she said weakly before kneeling onto the ground.

# ______

Murphy stirred hearing a sobbing noise, opening his eyes he was surprised to Jill on her knees staring at the ground. She looked almost possessed.

“Jill what are you doing?” He asked, confused. 

Rubbing the sleep from his eye he sat up fully and looked her up and down. He noticed the bloodied knife clenched tightly in her hand, and her bleeding wrist. He jumped up and kneeled next to her. “What have you done? Did you do this to yourself?”

Jill shook her head, Murphy placed his hands on her cheeks so she would look at him. Her eyes were swollen and puffy from crying. Jill mumbled something he wasn’t quite able to make out.

“What?”

Murphy’s surprisingly soft voice made her feel more guilty, “I killed someone.” 

Not expecting that answer Murphy stared at her for a moment before taking the knife from her hand. He dropped it down next to him before pulling Jill into his chest. He waited a few moments before asking what happened, “how did it happen?”

Jill leaned back from him and cliched at her chest. “A grounder attacked me, he was trying to kill me...I...I didn’t want to hurt him but he was going to kill me.”

Hearing Jill's voice break as she spoke made Murphy’s eyes fill with tears. He hated seeing her in so much pain. Glancing down he saw the drops of blood landing on the ground. “Do you want me to get Clarke or Octavia to look at your wrist?”

Jill shook her head, while wiping away tears. “No, she’s gone. They both are, and it’s all my fault. It’s all my fault John.”

Murphy frowned at the comment, he had no idea what happened but knew none of it wouldn’t have been her fault. “Lavy, tell me exactly what happened.”

“I ended up leaving with Clarke, Finn, and Myles.”

Murphy gritted his teeth at the thought of Myles being anywhere near Jill.

“I-I was fixing myself behind a tree when I heard a yelling, I looked over and saw Myles had been shot with an arrow, and the grounder taking Clarke and Finn. I panicked and did nothing, I should have done something.” She sobbed feeling terrible for not doing anything.

Murphy squeezed her good hand lightly, “you did the right thing.”

“A grounder attacked me and I ended up stabbing him in the neck.”

“Jill look at me.” Jill finally looked up from the ground and into Murphy’s dark blue eyes. “It wasn’t your fault, you did what you had to. Did you tell Bellamy?” She nodded. “Good, now they have a chance.”

He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “Now, can I look at your arm?”

# ______

Murphy was relieved that Jill had finally fallen asleep, he had spent over an hour trying to convince her what happened wasn’t her fault before she passed out from crying. Murphy had cleaned her wrist up with a first aid kit that he stole out of someone else’s tent. The best he could tell the cut wasn’t too deep, but he’d rather someone else looked at it in the morning. Murphy was afraid he’d done it wrong.

Bellamy had got a rescue party together a few hours earlier. Murphy argued with Bellamy and Raven that he wasn’t waking up Jill to show them where the grounders took Finn and Clarke. She was too weak and probably wouldn’t be any help. 

As he watched her sleep he couldn’t get the one thought out of his mind. Why did Myles go with them? Did he randomly pick them, or did he want to hurt Jill? It was no secret they hated each other. 

He had been paranoid since he arrived back that he would be floated again. If it wasn’t for Jill he would have ditched the camp and took his chances on the outside. He would suggest leaving together, but Murphy knew she would say no. If they were going to stay in camp he would need to find a way to make it safer for them. Murphy groaned into his hands. Not only did he need to worry about the threats outside the camp, he had to worry about the ones inside it as well.

Out of all his problems he knew how to fix one. Myles had to go.


End file.
